Things

He asked. I said yes. Soon we'll say "I do."

It is crazy how quickly life can change. Not only am I now planning a wedding, but my  wedding, and still beyond that, preparing to build the rest of my life with the man I love.

What's even more mind-boggling than that is how incredibly good God is to those who are willing to wait for Him. I cannot even begin to bless His name enough for the blessings He has bestowed upon me. 

But along with blessings come lessons too.

Because of the direction the Lord has led us, I've found myself confronted with the same struggles I was dealing with at the beginning of this year. The desire to hold on to earthly things and attachments is being tested full-force.

Things.

While I've never been especially covetous, I am very sentimental. As boxes of belongings need to be sorted through, this sentimental drive has been beating me up. On one shoulder, the small voice of self whispers, "It's okay to be attached to stuff. It's perfectly normal for a bride-to-be to load up her registry with nice things to make a house a home." On the other side, however, is voice of Jesus Christ saying, "Lay not up for yourselves treasures on the earth...but lay up for yourselves treasures in heaven." While gritting my teeth, I put another box of "stuff" in the Goodwill pile. Even though most of these things aren't practical, useful, or especially heart-warming, I still hate to get rid of those extra fiction novels or the clothes I may someday fit into.

I understand there are items we need to live and even things that are acceptable to still hold on to. There is nothing wrong with nice things but the problem arises in the power hold they hold over us. In part, the reason so many of my "things" are not coming with me is because Russell and I simply don't have room in my car or in our apartment for frivolous pretties. Yet, I know within me that the Lord is just teaching me a lesson I'll need for later. Sometime the need to pull this lesson off the shelf will arise and whenever the Lord sends us to the mission field, it will be put again to the test. Better learn it now.

The whole reason the Saviour pleads with us as Christians not to put stock in earthly belongings is simply this: "For where your treasure is, there will your heart be also."

My treasure cannot be found in matching plate sets, white picket fences, or a way of life that culture dictates. Instead, my treasures should be found in memories, people, and experiences and ultimately, those things that bring glory to God. Those are the things that last. There is freedom found in letting go and leaving things behind and turning focus upward and outward.

Thank you all for your support and prayers! I've been wishing for a bit of extra time to sit down a write a blog post and the Lord provided it today!

On December the 8th, I'm going to marry my bestest friend and honestly, the best young man I know. Remember, my friends, that the Lord ALWAYS does exceedingly abundant above what we could ever ask or think!



“Bit by bit treasured keepsakes and souvenirs were being wrested from me. I was being taught to live so that my most treasured mementos took the form of beautiful memories stored in the file of my heart." - Darlene Deibler Rose

Giving Away Best Friends: To Esther

I can still see us as a bunch of silly, giggling teenage girls laying on your bed talking about boys and how greatly they were to impact our futures.

We would talk out our "lists" of what qualities were important in a man and what characteristics (shallow and not-so shallow) we would like "the one" to possess. I was always far more embarrassed to share mine than you were. Of course, as often as it was brought up in conversation, it was easy to get over that.

I'm pretty sure the majority of our teenage conversations went something like this:

Esther: "Come on, Beth, who do you like?"
Beth: "Boys are obnoxious. Even if I did like someone, I wouldn't tell."
Esther: "Well, I am getting married someday and you will help and be in my wedding and then I'm going to have twenty-five kids and I really hope my kids have blue eyes."
Beth: "Hmph."

It baffles me how great our God is and how perfect His timing will always be. You've in every way, shape, and form protected your heart and body for the man the heavenly Father has chosen to be your soulmate. You have faithfully prepared to be not only a servant of the living God but also a wonderful wife and mother.

Even though we talked about your wedding day so much growing up, I never could have predicted how your love story would fall together. The thirteen year-old me wouldn't have been able to see the amazing woman you've become and how overwhelming the goodness of God can be.

I have always, always known that you were a real gem and I was not about to let you settle for anything less than you deserve. You know that verse about the virtuous woman? That's you through and through, my dear friend! You work hard at everything you do, you love people, serve God with a pure heart, and simply beam with a beauty that can only come from within. Kevin is lucky to have you. No, actually, Kevin is blessed to have you.

The next few days mark the last of our times as we've always known them. Your husband will become your best friend, your go-to person, and your top priority - and all as it well should be. Part of this selfish heart of mine aches knowing that things won't ever be quite the same again but most of me is inexplicably happy for you. This week, I'm giving my best friend to Kevin. I know the Maker of your heart has chosen him to care for it and that through His grace, your marriage will be molded into something wonderful.

On Saturday, after the flurry of last minute wedding plans and pulling things together, those doors to the church sanctuary will open and you'll stand there as a child of God, my kindred friend, and Kevin's bride. And what a beautiful bride you will be! I cannot even begin to express how hard it'll be for me not to cry up there and you know how much I dislike crying in front of people! But you're worth every tear and every smile in that church building.

I will see you tomorrow and I will cherish every second we spend getting ready for your big day. I love you more than I could ever say! Congratulations, Esther, you deserve nothing less than happily ever after.
 

“True friends are always together in spirit." ― L.M. Montgomery, Anne of Green Gables

Conflicting Details

You say you're open and honest. You're happy being the person you are and if anyone doesn't like it...deal with it. Sure, you mess up but when you do, you boast it nice and loud so everyone knows just how humble you are. After all, you'll readily admit your mistakes unlike cyborg-ish individuals such as myself. You're confident in who you are and in the fact that God loves you as you are.

Where in the Bible does it say being open about who you are is a substitute for being righteous? Please point me to the clause that gives Christians the excuse to slip into worldliness? Can I get blunt for a second?


God doesn't only call you to be honest, He demands you to be holy.

Speaking of honesty, if I were honest with myself, that single word strikes more fear into my being than just about anything else. That "Be ye holy; for I am holy" verse? It is not optional, it is a necessity. The verse before that penned by the apostle Peter says that Christians are to be holy in "all manner of conversation." I am certain that the words "friggin" and "that sucks" do not glorify the God who gave you the ability to speak.

Now please don't think I'm being Pharisaical. I know the Lord loved and still loves the sinners and the outcasts of this world. They are the reason He came in the first place. However, the beauty of our great Saviour is that He loves sinners too much to leave them that way. He reaches out to the sinner with tender mercy and draws them out of a horrible pit to set their feet upon a rock. He puts a new song in the mouth of a newborn saint and gives them the victory to overcome the clutches of the old man. Why are you still looking and sounding like an old man when He has given you the power to be new? Why do you so desperately seek to be approved by a world who scorned Him? We are not called to relate to worldliness but we are called to relay the message of eternity. The words we speak should not be words of compromise but should be sparking conversion through Christ-like conversation. We are to walk as He walked through the paths of righteousness for His name's sake.

I am not perfect. I battle my own flesh every single day. Sometimes I catch myself falling more and more into who I used to be and I hate that. Perhaps my frustration stems from the fact that I am trying to desperately to become more like Christ and everywhere I turn Christians are content to reflect the World.

I'm not funny. I'm not witty. I don't have exceptional class or the superior ability to fit in. More and more I'm coming to realize, though, that none of that matters in light of eternity. Lord Jesus, take me as I am now and change me into someone more like You.

P.S.  - I really am not trying to offend or seem overly harsh. It is not in any way shape or form my intention to say that we should forget about loving people or not forgiving them their faults. I'm just as guilty of this mindset as the next person and would never want to portray a "holier than thou" attitude. I am not ranting at anyone in particular but rather, expressing my sadness over a mindset that starts into Christian's being apathetic and lukewarm. S'all. :]

"Character in a saint means the disposition of Jesus Christ persistently manifested." –Chambers