2015

Praying you all have had a safe and happy holiday season!

I know sometimes the holidays can be hard.

But I truly hope that in your heart you still know the joy that only comes from knowing the Saviour.

It's hard to believe 2015 is here. It is impossible to say what this year will have in store but I know whatever it is, that the Lord already has been there and He has approved it and He will keep us through it.

"Be assured, if you walk with Him and look to Him and expect help from Him, He will never fail you." —George Muller

Two Years

Two and a half years ago a young man sat across from me on a picnic bench and laid his heart out on the line. I’ll never forget him trying to engage my distracted self into a conversation about the future - about us. I’ll also never forget the way it hit me when I realized exactly what he was suggesting and just how serious he was being.

I can't imagine the look of shock on my face as I stared at him.

Russ was my friend.

When I was being the biggest grouch in the world, he was there to ignore my grouchiness. When I was following my own choices instead of the Lord’s, he was calmly praying for God’s will in life. When I smacked him with a ping pong paddle (that’s another story) he was there to laugh at my embarrassment. When our group was in the mood for a healthy debate, he was there to argue with us all. He was my friend. A good friend.

I never could have imagined that the Lord would take our friendship and mix it into the wonderful journey that is marriage. In fact, when the crazy man asked me to pray about pursuing a relationship, it was like an anvil being dropped on my head. Russ was right there all along just being my friend. It was an “Oh, there you are,” sort of moment. 

And you know what I’m realizing more and more? The friendship that drew us together is the friendship that keeps us close together.

He can tell me when I’m being a pain. He can point out to me the other side of the story when all I can see is my own frustration and hurt. He puts up with my sad attempts at humor and laughs at my jokes any way. Because our love is rooted in our friendship it goes so much deeper than just romance.

 I have heard about the hard adjustments some experience when they are newly married. For us, it was sort of like a piece of the puzzle fitting. We spent just about every day of two school years together as friends, three months apart as boyfriend/girlfriend, and three months engaged long-distance. Marriage, for us, was sort of like coming home.

It’s hard to believe we’ve been married two years.
It has been a beautiful, sorrowful, joyful, growing two years.

We have faced things (and are still facing things) no couple in the early twenties ever expects to face. I am so incredibly thankful to have his shoulder to cry on when my heart is repetitively broken. I have his hand to hold in that half-asleep dreamy state of three in the morning. I have his laughter to warm my heart. We’ve learned. We’ve loved. We’ll keep learning and loving and trusting God.

I’m so blessed, truly, with this man.

Happy Anniversary, sweet Russell.

When Life Doesn't Go Our Way

"I was to discover, however, that when I took my eyes off the circumstances that were overwhelming me, over which I had no control, and looked up, my Lord was there, standing on the parapet of heaven looking down. Deep in my heart He whispered, "I'm here. Even when you don't see Me, I'm here. Never for a moment are you out of My sight."- Darlene Deibler Rose

If I were to share with you today what was in my heart it'd be ugly. Really ugly. I get so wrapped up in the hurts and disappointments of my own life that I let it turn my focus off of things that matter. It's ugly and it is so wrong.

Instead of praying for more faith, I pout about having no table of my own to put a few fall pumpkins on. I don't thank the Lord for the blessings He's bestowed on others but rather beg for similar blessings to be bestowed on us. Rather than ask the Lord for a kind heart, a sweet spirit, and a burden for people, I mull through the day to day wishing for a "someday".

God knew these struggles before I ran into them. He knew that we would stumble into the murky fogs of uncertainty. He knew that in order to get out of the brambles of doubt we'd have to take a step (or a lot of steps) of faith. I thank Him that He has promised to give more grace.

I need to retrain my heart to think on important things. Things like God and my husband and ministry and loving the life that the Lord has given me. I need to remember to hand everything over to the One who is ready and willing to not only take our burdens, but to give us the joy to sustain us along the road.

I do praise Him abundantly for His provision and also for His everlasting patience with this sulky, rotten child of His. He has always been faithful and He will be again and again. How blessed I truly have been! So in this month of thankfulness, I pray the Lord will continue to teach me to be content in every situation. I truly do long to have a thankful heart.

What are you focusing on this November? Please share.

"Teach me to do Thy will; for Thou art my God: Thy spirit is good; lead me into the land of uprightness." - Psalm 143:10

Pray for me friends!